Tuesday, October 27, 2009

impromptu

a saltie morning

when i lived
in seattle,
at any moment
of any day
i could call
a friend
or a brother
and
they'd
meet me
for coffee
or a drink
or lunch
in an hour.

on snow days
we'd all
slowly trudge
to the nearest
coffeeshop
(victrola)
and
meet each
other
with smiles
and rosey cheeks.

i miss that.
i miss that
so so much.
i know
life changes
but
i thought
i would
always
live
in the
same town
as my closest
friends.

but they
are all
scattered
across the country.

there are
days
(many of them)
when i wish-
i need
so much
to call
them up
and see them
in the hour.

strange
how hard
it is
to make
close friends
as you get older.
is it because
we aren't as
open to it
as we once were
whispering
all night
at slumber parties?

i wonder.

sending out
hugs
to all
my dearest friends.
from amsterdam
to nyc
to raleigh
to nashville
to tehachapi
to oakland
to portland
to seattle.
and
those of you
that
i have yet
to meet.

see you
in
an hour.
okay?

xo

24 comments:

jen said...

i have been feeling this way lately too. so many of my friends have moved on from this town and yet i remain, always wondering when i will meet them in another town. at least they are still a phone call away!
xo

lookwhaticando said...

Oh...this just touched my heart. I too wonder why it is so hard to make friends as we get older? My friends are scattered across the country now too and so many days I really need to just meet up with them.
See you in an hour is just such a sweet thing...aaahhh life. :)

Pravina Studio said...

Here here!
I know exactly what you mean. It does seem like those kinds of friendships are harder to find nowadays.

Sometimes it feels like the days of having my best friends living in the same city couldn't have really happened, because I can't even imagine what that would be like now.

Kerstin Svendsen said...

i know the feeling! oxox

lisa s said...

i wish. for sure.
an hour. will be there

Anna said...

oh this makes my heart heavy. how beautiful. i too have nostalgic and wonderful memories of victrola, even though i still live in seattle. beautiful writing.

belinda said...

me too gwen, me too...
for macchiatos, yes?

no. not coffee-
i think more likely cocktails.
yes, a much better idea :)

shari said...

i feel like that too. i think in our time it is just so common to move anywhere...i've been thinking of that alot. we've moved four times recently and i miss the friends we've made in each of the cities where we've lived. it gets harder and harder with each move. there's something to be said for growing roots. LOVE this photo. xo

Alichka said...

I think about this a lot too, and have had this conversation. Was being an undergrad the ideal condition to make those close, foreverfriends? Is the combination of living together in one perfect bubble of angst and vulnerability and carefree-dom the perfect condition for opening your heart to people like that? It worries me so much to think that you trade those moments when you enter adulthood. *sigh*

dingbatdc said...

I miss you Gwen! Moving away and starting over is so hard. Making new friends doesn't seem to happen as naturally and how to keep up with everyone from your previous life??

sigh

Christine Gram said...

so true, it is harder... but I think it's because each of us thinks that the others are too busy for a new friend, or don't like to be interrupted, or... when in fact, meeting for coffee would be wonderful. thanks ;)

Jess said...

it must be in the weather's change...autumn always leaves me nostalgic too.

f. pea said...

Oh, my heart hurts.

hugs
hugs
hugs

See you in 45 minutes.

Anonymous said...

(said in voice of person with stuffed nasal passages....)

"I'LL BE YER FRIEND PONY..."

(miss chez grub et ponee)....

Danielle said...

i am a stranger here on your blog, but this is something i'm dealing with too, in a lot of ways. so i thought i would say hi.

A Day That is Dessert said...

Hugs to you. I feel this way from time to time; I hope not to move again ever to have deep roots for myself and my children.

amanda said...

i just moved to vancouver and left all my friends behind in sydney, so yes, i totally get this. :(

asphaltandair said...

this post has left me completely teary eyed.
i've got friends scattered around the globe too.
i miss my tribe. i miss being able to call on someone and meet them in an hour. and be "home".
*sigh*

SRA said...

The greatest relief for the "I miss my friends...I miss my old life blues" that I've found is writing a heart-felt letter...and share with them a special memory I have of them. Then, I put it in the snailmail, because let's face it, everyone loves to get something in the snailmail other than a bill! It's sweet knowing someone is thinking of you or remembering a moment you have shared together with a smile. Wonderful post....

Isabelle said...

Lovely. This captures exactly how I feel since most of my close friends are also scattered across the country. It's terrible to become such good friends with someone and then have to move so far away. On the plus side, it gives us an excuse to travel and go visit them!

Webgrrl74 said...

I completely relate.

My friends have all married, had babies or moved elsewhere. I am having a very hard time making new friends. :(

Other than that, my other friends are a 7 hour plane ride away. I so wish they were closer to meet for coffee.

emily said...

aah. i have never had those people in my nearby life. it's one of the things that i miss - in the way you can miss things you've never known, you know?

suzamaphone said...

i miss the same things, gwennie. i miss you, i miss being so close to your family, i miss dinner parties with you, john and your brothers and sister, i miss soup nights and 16mm movies at the house on 17th. i even miss helping you de-moth that kitchen. i miss rice & beans architecto. i miss having to stop what i'm doing to pose for a picture every 5 minutes. and yeah, i don't go to victrola anymore (stumptown is where it's at now), but i'd love to meet you there in an hour.

sigh.... wish you were coming home for the holidays. i'm going to miss seeing you this christmas. big xoxo's to you, my pony.

6p00d83451e27369e2 said...

This post made my throat tight. The reason that I live in Sonoma County despite it's bad city-planning and expensive-for-no-reason-ness is because I love seeing my friends. Calling someone up just to go run stupid errands with. Or to get help with a craft project. Or go to the bookstore. Or, or, or... lived across the country once. It literally didn't last a year. Moved, bought a house, sold house, moved back. It's just too impossible to live when the feeling of 'belonging' is lost. Thank you for capturing this in words more eloquent than mine ;)